Breastfeeding: the role of the father
It 's a common thought that breastfeeding excludes neopapà while the bottle involving fathers. Or to involve fathers in breastfeeding is necessary to pull the milk to give it to his dad with a bottle.
Personally I think they are the usual cliches, a little 'how to say "breastfeeding fraying" (as if clean, sterilize, prepare the bottle was relaxing!).
Dads have a crucial role in breastfeeding, much more than they can imagine.
A man may think, "What have I to do with breastfeeding? Mica I have the breast."
true that man does not have breasts, but it is not equipped with the uterus and vagina, and therefore often assist and cooperate actively in the birth of his mate!
First of all dads can provide practical help.
Helping mom get comfortable, bring pillows, handing her the baby after she has settled in comfortably. They seem silly, but particularly in the early days of breastfeeding care are far from negligible.
Even at night, these gestures are especially welcome, and can help make a mother feel less left to itself in this task. The fundamental task
of fathers, however, is to return to the primary role of "male" and that is to protect the mother of his baby (and his puppy) from the surrounding environment.
As often when a woman becomes a mother discovers her side "animal" in the sense of instinctive, primordial (just think of them or some very strong feelings that you can try when you have a newborn), also neopapà should remember that are not nothing but mammals males.
Dad should do everything possible to create a peaceful and secure around the neofamiglia, defending tooth and nail (figuratively!) The "nest", then filter with respect to visits from family and friends ( that most often are a source of stress), phone calls, all the practical tasks that will certainly weigh on his mate.
I also think that the thing that most of the mothers ask their partner to be confidence: confidence in their ability to be mothers, trust in what they are doing.
often has problems when breastfeeding mothers tell me that her partner has fielded "the enemy", which is the pediatrician or mother-in-law does not matter, however, be a part of those who think the opposite way, by questioning the choices of the mother (perhaps trivializing arguments like "you are not bright because of the hormonal storm" and so on).
This does not necessarily mean that the mother is always right and others always wrong, but I see the fathers generally accepted welcome the apparently simple solution.
We know that the male brain is different from the female, so in the face of a difficult man proposes practical solutions and rational, while women prefer dialogue, listening and understanding.
's the classic misunderstanding that brings forth the arguments in pairs: she has a problem and wants to talk, just talk, do not ask for someone to find a solution. But he responded with suggestions and explanations ... and the beginning of misunderstanding!
during breastfeeding, this means "Do you have some milk?" From a bottle of adding "or" Are you tired? Stop breastfeeding or pulled the milk that I'll ".
From practical point of view these arguments do not make a turn, or rather, I believe that many people do not understand why a woman who encounters difficulties during breastfeeding is so much distressed to find a different solution from the bottle.
But there are far from insignificant details.
The first and perhaps most obvious is that the infant formula is still far from being equivalent to breast milk (and even if a far-off days will become, there remains the fact that breast milk is free)
.
The other is that breastfeeding is one of the phases of the reproductive process that begins at conception, develops in pregnancy, childbirth and flows into the ends, of course, with breastfeeding. When one of these steps "jump", it is natural that most women feel in crisis.
We want to turn the situation to the men? Let's say your partner can not have children naturally, and you tell him "Do not worry, darling, will use the seed from a donor. Just the same, eventually the son will grow us so we will be in effect. "Sure, it's a road you can take, but I do not think that a man makes that choice in the blink of an eye, and off she is glad that you propionate so lightly! He will need time to ponder and to accept a procedure that somehow calls into question his "be a man".
What can a father do then?
First learn, if possible during pregnancy, not only parturition and how can be of help, but also about breastfeeding: how it works, what is "normal", so that will not be surprised if that tiny puppy eat so often or if its rhythms are irregular.
This may also be a barrier to the "bad advice" that is, those who criticize the mother for not breastfeeding because they do not give a timetable or a bottle of water or camomile.
I assure you that for a mother, the target of this criticism is of great relief to have the support of partners!
If problems arise, the father's role becomes even more important.
In 2005 a study was undertaken in Campania on a group of parents. To all the mothers were given advice on breastfeeding. The fathers were instead divided into two groups: one group received no information, the other group was formed specifically on the management of common problems of breastfeeding.
The results were astounding: the difference between the two groups was very marked, that breastfeeding was more common in the group where fathers had been trained. For example, in the group where the father had not been formed, the mothers who were perceived to have little milk were 27%, while the other group, the percentage decreased to 9%.
It 'clear that nowadays breastfeeding is not just "women stuff" involves men and have a great responsibility in its success.
So, dear papa, you are not excluded from feeding breast.
have an important role even if your work often takes place in the shade!
Sara Cosano
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